Reiki Healing by Ashley

     As a Certified Practitioner of Reiki, I am seeking to expand my practice and promote physical, emotional, and spiritual comfort to those who desire respite from the negative influences in their lives.

     Reiki is the practice of utilizing Universal Life Energy to promote relaxation and self-healing in a personal and judgment-free atmosphere. Each session lasts approximately one hour and will take place in the comfort of a home studio. Skype sessions are also available for those who live elsewhere in the country and the world.

     I offer introductory prices for those who are unfamiliar with Reiki, as well as package deals for those who are interested in ongoing sessions. Referring a new client will result in a $10 credit towards your next session!

     Please feel free to contact me at Reiki Healing by Ashley with any questions you may have or to set up an appointment.

     My rates are:
           

           First time client: $20
           One 1 hour session: $50
           Package of three 1-hour sessions: $110

Father's Day Reiki Special

I am having a Father’s Day special. June 1 through June 18, if you buy one Reiki session at $50, you get one free. What is Reiki, you ask. It is the Universal Life Energy to promote healing and relaxation. It heals on every level: mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. We all know Dads are hard to shop for. If yours is like mine, you get the, “Oh, I don’t need anything” or “Don’t worry about getting me anything”. Which is frustrating when you really want to get him something that shows that you care!

Visit my page Reiki Healing by Ashley, and schedule your appointments before it’s too late to take advantage of this amazing deal! I’m filling up fast, so hurry!

The Present

So today went well. I met my biological father. He lives ten hours away and drove straight through to visit me for the first time in my memory. My mother kept him away in her own selfish spite since I was a few months old, and I was adopted by a wonderful man whom I call Daddy. He, my biological father, took me to breakfast and lunch and we chatted a bit about nothing and everything. He even brought me a nice massage table for my Reiki practice, which I am very grateful for.  

At breakfast, it was really... it was amazing... So I really wanted a certain pendant that Danyel Harrison of Handmade Mystic had crafted. When I saw this beautiful piece of art, I just felt that it had been made just for me... but was heartbroken when I found that it had sold before I could buy it. No surprise, really. It’s a truly magnificent piece, much like the rest of her wonderfully beautiful and unique work.  My biological father had missed my birthday by a few months, and I was not expecting anything from him yet he presented me with a very late birthday present nonetheless. I carefully tore the paper off the tiny box, nervous at this first interaction with this strange man I had never before met… and low and behold the mystery inside this tiny box was… the pendant that I fell in love with!

Racially Biased

This meme has been floating around. Let me explain why a white person saying "I hate black people" (racism) is different than a person of color - who happen to be minorities - saying "I hate white people"(racially biased). One of my friends, who is a WOC (woman of color) explained the difference to me, so now I'm going to try to explain it using the analogies that came to mind when she was explaining it to me. First, let’s go to Google for the definition of racism:

rac·ism

ˈrāˌsizəm/

noun

1. prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against someone of a different race based on the belief that one's own race is superior.
2. "a program to combat racism"

synonyms:

racial discrimination, racialism, racial prejudice, xenophobia, chauvinism, bigotry, casteism "Aborigines are the main victims of racism in Australia"

• the belief that all members of each race possess characteristics or abilities specific to that race, especially so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races.
• noun: racism
• "theories of racism"

People of color can't be racist. Racism means that you have the power to oppress an entire people, which white people do having most of the political power and having laws still in place that still benefit white people and discriminate against people of color. A person of color does not have the power to oppress any other group, therefore they cannot be racist. However, they can be racially biased. Racism is the systematic oppression and discrimination against a group of people based on their skin color, belief system, etc. White people believe that they are superior to everyone else in the world. People of color don't like, or "hate", white people because we - as a race - oppress them and make their lives miserable. It's like the difference between Nazis saying that he hates Jewish people vs Jewish people saying they hate Nazis. Nazis hated the Jewish people and because of that hatred oppressed and tortured an entire people, whereas Jewish people hated (hate) Nazis for inflicting inhumane hatred and torture on them. Does that make hating Nazis bad? Nope. It's perfectly normal - and healthy - to hate those who oppress and condemn you just for your beliefs or the color of your skin. You aren't oppressed by a person of color hating you, therefore it's not racism. Are the Jewish people racist for hating Nazis? In the same way, minorities - most often times people of color - are *still* abused and discriminated against today by white people. So how are they racist if they say they don't like white people when white people are the ones treating them as lesser beings in the first place? White people as a whole are still oppressing and discriminating against people of color. Build the wall, go back to where you came from, white power.... you don't see anyone else displaying this kind of hatred. In fact, this kind of hatred is what's fueling Isis.

Saying "not all white people" is like saying "not all men". As women, we know not all men are bad, but how the hell are we supposed to know which men are safe and which ones are going to hurt us? We don't. In the same way, how the hell does a person of color know which white people are safe and which ones want to hurt them? They don't. We as women are biased against men because we don't know which ones are safe. We're taught to hold our keys between our fingers, have pepper spray just in case.... what are tools to use against racism? There aren't really any, and if they do speak out they're suddenly racist for calls by out a racist. There is no winning for a person of color.

We as white people are not being oppressed by minorities. Have you seen the news lately? Build the Wall! Go back where you came from! Muslims are a cancer! Black people are thugs! …. But then we continue to justify our hatred because of the bombings going on. Have you ever thought that your hatred is the reason those things happen? Your hatred fuels their hatred. ISIS can easily find all of these awful posts on social media about how awful anyone who isn’t white is. We as a race still treat minorities like shit. We are the sore losers of history, rubbing our pseudo victory in the faces of those we deem to be losers. We take one step further, even, brushing the atrocities our country committed under the rug of time so that it’s easier to pretend it never happened. Because that’s so much easier than a changed behaviour. That’s so much easier than addressing the problem that we still have today, because let’s face it, people of color are still oppressed and discriminated against today. We march for equality, but it’s not intersectional equality that we march for. We march for our own gain, our own cause, and remain blind to those who still need help and still need a voice.

People of color - minorities - cannot be racist, but they can be racially biased. But then, who could really blame them?

Sex, Periods, and Equality

     Let's have one of those uncomfortable conversations. You know, the ones about sex, periods, and equality. There have been a lot of people sticking their noses where they don't belong as of late. Have you noticed? It's uncomfortable and rude. Is what I'm doing affecting you in any way? Am I hurting you? Am I forcing you to participate in my activities? No? No. So worry about yourself, not what I'm doing.

     Sex. Sex is fun. Sex is awesome. Sex is healthy. I am so tired of religious nuts shaming people out of sex as if it's some sort of evil activity. "Satan's doorbell" comes to mind when a religious person is talking about a woman's vagina. The truth of the matter is, not everyone is religious, and those of you who are need to respect those of us who exercise our own free will even if it doesn't fall in line with what you choose to believe and follow. Which leads me into birth control. Why is this a controversy? First of all, life does not begin at conception. It is a scientific fact. Life begins at about twenty weeks into pregnancy when the brain begins to develop and the fetus can then be viable outside of the womb - with a ton of wires and machines attached to it. So using birth control to prevent pregnancy is not the "willful murder" of human beings. Yes, I was actually told this. No, it is not killing babies. You can't kill something that doesn't exist in the first place. And another thing, why is all the shaming pointed at women? I have heard maybe one man - ONE - tell another man that sleeping around with multiple women wasn't cool and wasn't something to be proud of. According to society, it's perfectly okay for a man to sleep around, but the moment a women chooses to have multiple partners, she's slut shamed. Hell, women are even slut shamed for being raped. This is the messed up world we live in! End the hypocrisy. Respect our choice to be sexually active for the fun of it without objectifying us. Respect our choice to not reproduce. Women are not baby machines.

     Periods. Yes, they're gross, but so is a lot of other stuff. This is a natural cycle of life that a lot of people have very little understanding of, including a lot of young women thanks to our poor educational system. We can't help it, it just happens. Blood start flowing from our vagina about once a month, if you're lucky enough to be on a regular cycle. Some women - like me - are on very irregular cycles. Periods are finicky things, really. You can breathe wrong and suddenly you're three days late for no reason at all. Okay, maybe not that finicky, but periods are affected by what we eat, what we do, the amount of stress we have, etc. You could be three days late because you're stressing about work, you started a new exercise routine, you changed your diet, etc. Unfortunately, periods also bring with them some pretty awful side effects such as bad cramps, and in some cases, *gasp* diarrhea. This is particularly problematic at work. You have to use the restroom several times a day to change your preferred period product, which is a hassle if you work with customers who may get annoyed at your constant need for a break. Periods suck, anyway, but now you have angry people to deal with. You would be cranky in this situation, too.

     Equality. Women deserve this. Respect the decisions we make for ourselves. We aren't hurting you. And no, you can't hit us. Stop using this tactic to scare us back into submission. This isn't a power struggle. The only thing you are losing is the ability to be a self righteous ass. Your opinions of our sex life and our periods are none of your concern. Stop cat-calling us. Stop harassing us. We don't owe you anything. Sex won't stretch our vagina; it's a muscle not a tendon. Plus, we push mini humans out of those things, you really think that women who have had kids now have gaping craters down under? Your penis isn't that awesome, sorry. Periods are gross, but not as gross as misogyny. No, women aren't man haters, and if you spout off "not all men" then you're likely part of the problem and you need to evaluate yourself. Let us be human beings. Stop shaming and belittling us for our choices - choices that harm NO ONE. And mind your own damn business.

     Thanks.

We Are Love

     Why do we feel the need to kill each other? Why do we hold such hatred and contempt for our fellow humans? They say it's just human nature, but I don't believe that. Writing this hatred and behavior off as "human nature" is ableism. It's a way to continue down this road of anger, bigotry, contempt, and hatred for one another without feeling guilty. Because having to actually look at the monstrous beings we've become is too scary to acknowledge. Having to correct our ways for the better is too much work, and people are too lazy for self-work. No, it's so much easier to just ignore the problem. But ignoring the problem will result in mass extinction, I promise. If we continue down this road of hate and anger.... Well, we're one wrong move, one wrong word away from World War 3, and everyone has nukes now. Do you really think that we'll survive? We are killing ourselves by polluting into the air, into the water, by cutting down the trees that give us the air that we need to breathe. Honestly, if we wipe ourselves out with war, then we deserve it. . . But.... We have the power to change our fate. We can, each of us, look in the mirror and acknowledge the monsters that we have become and we can choose to be better. Every single day, we can choose to be a better person. We can choose love. We can choose compassion. We can choose kindness. We can choose goodness. We can choose to be decent human beings to our follow human beings.

     "We are Love, Limitless. Always, and in all ways." ~ Emily Jean Benson (Check this amazing being out on Facebook. She has the most amazing videos and posts.)

Non-citizen Immigrants: You're Welcome Here

     So I have seen a lot of hate towards immigrants lately (hmmmm..... I wonder why...). Or basically anyone who doesn't "look" American (America is a continent, by the way). Most immigrants that come to the United States are trying to escape a terrible life. They are faced with death threats, kidnapping, rape, and other very nightmarish and traumatizing events. Most of these people actually seek out the border patrol. They have just walked miles and miles in a hot dry desert after very dangerous human trafficking conditions - yes, they get dumped somewhere and have to find their way to safety. They are happy to see that border patrol agent. They are then taken into the custody of that patrol officer, willingly. Then they go through the whole application process of becoming a citizen which can take YEARS (one man just got his citizenship after over TWENTY years).

     I'm also seeing a lot of, "Oh, you came here and now you want us to give you special treatment? Oh boo hoo. Cry me a river!" Well, that's total crap. First of all, we help our citizens who need it. Extra help in school. Help finding jobs. Etc. So why can't we find it in our hearts to help a stranger who wishes to be a friend? They can't speak English, or speak broken English? Then be patient and help them to better understand, and while you're at it, maybe expand your own horizons and learn a foreign language. Seriously, the U.S. is one of the only countries who doesn't require learning at least a second language. Why are we so full of ourselves? We are not better than the rest of the world and learning a new language or two is fun. Secondly, a lot of these hateful people are sorely misinformed about what non-citizen immigrants have access to. Let me make it perfectly clear for you. Non-citizen immigrants have ZERO (0) access to government assistance. Absolutely none. And no, they are not stealing your jobs. A job is impossible to steal. They applied for the job, and because their employer can get away with paying them less for the same amount if not MORE work, they are obviously going to hire a non-citizen immigrant because employers are greedy assholes. If you have a problem in regards to jobs, you're all pointing your fingers in the wrong direction. Which is exactly what the corporations want. If they keep the masses distracted and angry at each other, no one will notice their messed up game. Also, non-citizen immigrants actually pay taxes to the government. So they pay into something they may not ever be able to use if their application for citizenship is denied.

     In the end, non-citizen immigrants aren't looking for "special treatment". They want to be understood and treated with dignity and respect. They want to be seen as human beings. They want to be equal. Come on, people! Where is your humanity? Where is your love and compassion? Your understanding and empathy? We are all in this together. Why are we treating each other like shit just because they look different and speak a different language?

     Let's find our peace and love, everyone.

Invalidation

     So I'm feeling invalidated. I know I am not alone in this. You get people talking over you, interrupting you, or just flat out ignoring you. You feel like a doormat. You feel unappreciated. You don't feel like you really matter. It's not a nice feeling, that's for sure. And it's not like it only happens once every once in a while. No, that would be tolerable. It happens every single day, multiple times a day. It wears on you. It hurts. It's eroding your emotional and mental state of being until all that's left is a hollow shell of who you used to be. You get angry, and those who wronged you in the first place are blaming you for being angry at being used as a doormat. So you bottle it up and just deal with it the best way you know how: try to be invisible. SO you get home, and then what do you do with all that bottled up frustration? Nothing. What can you do? This, however, is not healthy.

     I can tell you some things that help me cope with this. At first, I would try to shove it down further and forget about it the best that I could. But that was just a disaster. Now, I step back, take a deep breath and look at it objectively. I ask myself questions to try to analyze the situation. I try to understand the other person better. Why does this person feel the need to speak over me, interrupt me, or just ignore me? Did I do something to trigger this? What are they going through? Granted, this doesn't always work, and I still feel angry and upset. Exercise has also helped me. I have also found that smudging my apartment does wonders to lift my mood.

     In the end, however, you really just need to find a way to get yourself safely out of that situation. That kind of mental and emotional beating wears on you after a while, and that's not good. Depression and anxiety may start to creep in. And those lead to whole messes of other problems that are a pain to get rid of. I also look at each situation I find myself in as a learning experience. What can be learned from this situation and my feelings? Ultimately, you have to do what's best for you.

     Much love to you all!

Mother's Day

     So Mother's Day is this Sunday May 14, 2017. This means that you're either a mom who requires a much needed break or that you have at least one woman in your life whom you need to celebrate. Mother's are special. They are heroes. They work hard to make sure their babies have everything they need. 

     How are you celebrating the Mother in your life this Sunday? You may be among the many people who are having trouble deciding what to get your Mom or the Mother of your children for Mother's Day. Some suggestions include: clean the house, cook dinner, get the kids dressed and fed (LET HER SLEEP IN), etc. For you single Moms, you are most definitely a rock star! You do this day in and day out with at least one job to keep your kids clothed, fed, and make sure they have a roof over their heads. That is incredible, and you deserve to be treated, too! 

     For those of you who still aren't sure what to get that Goddess for Mother's Day or for those of you who do this all on your own, I have a special going on until May 21, 2017. Buy one Reiki session at full price ($50 USD) and get a session free. 

     But what exactly is Reiki?

     Excellent question! Reiki is the use of Universal Life Energy to promote relaxation and healing on an emotional and spiritual level, as well as a physical level. In essence, it is a form of energy healing. 

     I offer sessions over Skype. A Reiki session typically lasts about an hour. Please note that it does not replace the medical care of a doctor, but rather works in harmony with traditional care. If you want to know more or want to set up an appointment, contact me on my Facebook page: Reiki Healing by Ashley.

     Happy Mother's Day!!

Revising School

School: something everyone is required to participate in. However, it does much more harm than good. We need to stop treating students like they are all the same, like they all have the same learning styles. No, students are unique and need to be treated as such. The school system is broken with too much testing and not nearly enough learning. We’re forced to memorize things that float out of our heads as soon as we select the answer on the test and then do it all over again. This is not making us smarter. Education needs to be tailored to the learner, not to government testing.

“Oh, but that’s unrealistic. How are we going to tailor learning to each student,” ask the naysayers.

Well, we have currently standardised testing. Instead, it should be a test to see how each student learns in each particular subject. This test should be in middle school so that all the basics are learned there. Then, when they move to high school:

~Freshmen students ought to learn things like how to budget a bank account/check book and by extension, how to budget for bills and necessities (basically money management in general). They should learn basic cooking skills and housekeeping skills. They should learn basic maintenance of a house, how to fix a small electrical problem, small plumbing issues, etc. Health class is really important here: now we should be learning about mental illness and other important things. Extensive reproductive education is also very important. A physical “education” class should also be in place every semester until graduation, except there should be options: yoga, swim, walking, running, weights, zumba. Let the students try everything until something sticks. This is very important for mental health as well as physical.

~Sophomores should now choose a field of study or career path that they are interested in and take classes specifically tailored to that choice. This on top of all the basic knowledge classes so they get lots of practice before actually heading out into the real world. Add a recreational class of their choosing in which they are learning something that they really have an interest in. Expand the mind. A new subject may be selected every semester until graduation.

~Juniors should shadow someone in their career choice (if one is chosen). Also, learning how to write proper resumes should now be introduced as well. Still keeping up with all the learning of how to function as an adult (though this should now be limited to maybe one class a day rather than the whole day as it is in the Freshman model).

~Seniors should start volunteering and becoming aware of social issues that plague their area. Such as homelessness, hunger, environmental, etc. Volunteering will help them become well rounded on an emotional/spiritual level and learn to have empathy for their follow human beings. They should also now have a pretty good idea of adult life and should be looking at apartments if they choose not to go to college (because there is nothing wrong with not going to college if it’s not for you!). If they aren’t actually going to move out right at first, then it’s at least important to know how to go through the application process of apartments. Now is the time to start applying all of that basic knowledge and taking the leap into adulthood. Fly, little birds! Chase your dreams!

Obviously this model needs some work, but it is so much better than testing our youth to death. Seriously, we don’t take that many tests as adults. How many of us actually remember anything we learned from high school? It’s ridiculous. And yes, I hear the naysayers again, “Shouldn’t the parents do all of that?!” Why, yes, yes they should be doing that. However, how many of them actually know how to do all of that safely? How many parents are even home? Today, both parents have to work just to keep a roof over the family’s head and food in the fridge. So let’s teach the kids how to do this stuff in school so that they can properly function as adults.

It takes a village.